guess the dish!

I like to experiment in the kitchen and try out new recipes and I thought I'd share a picture of what I made for dinner last night and see if any of you could guess what it is!


Hint: it's ethnic. Ha, but anything other than hot dogs could be considered "ethnic" if you think about it. Oh, that's another hint, it's not a hot dog.

tater tot the toothless wonder: update

Tater Tot went under the knife on Tuesday. He was very scared to be away from home for that long, and it was really sad to be Tater Tot-less for a whole day and night. Sometimes I sit back and reflect on how important Tater is in my life and I have to remind myself that he is a dog, not a child. But...well, I still act like a doting mother. I called the vet at 5 p.m. because I hadn't heard from their office all day and I wanted to see how the pup was doing. He had just gotten out of surgery and was doing fine but was still asleep. The doctor called me back 30 minutes later and was so sweet and explained the procedure and everything she did.

I won't go into details because there's nothing worse than reading about some gross surgery and then scrolling down to find a cupcake recipe, but Tater had a total five teeth removed (the doctor saved them and gave them to me, EW!). He was pretty groggy when I picked him up yesterday but he's doing just fine. He has been quieter than usual because I think his mouth still hurts, but if you ask me that's a good thing. He's very happy that he gets to eat delicious wet dog food instead of the usual dry food because it's too hard for his sensitive mouth.

Most importantly, thank you all so much for your support!! I honestly didn't think anyone would donate, but my friend Bebe suggested it and I thought "Yeah! Why not?" and was pleasantly surprised by your donations! It means a lot to me to know that outside of my real-life friends and family, I have the support of my blog-life friends and family. When I started this blog way back in December I figured Twin would read it, and maybe a few high school friends. I had no idea that I would meet such amazing people all around the world just by writing a silly blog. Thank you all for reading!

if anyone orders merlot, i'm leaving

I went wine tasting last night. Well, more like wine chugging for me. Ha, I am the worst wine taster ever. The pourers kept trying to explain the wines to me and it was very clear I wasn't even trying to listen to what they had to say "Uh huh, cool, can I get some more of that white wine? Oh you're out of that? Then more of whatever, it doesn't matter. Thanks."

I rarely ever drink, but when I do my motto is always "go big or go home" which I always end up regretting the next day. I woke up this morning at 6 AM, still intoxicated and feeling worse and worse with every minute. FYI, there is nothing on TV at 6 AM. My choices included: a travel show on roller coasters, men's singles tennis at the Olympics, and a history channel show on the different land speed records in the United States...aka the worst things to watch when you're trying to make the room stop spinning.

Currently, I'm feeling incredibly hung over, I'm still wearing my make up from last night, and I'm all sorts of congested for some reason. In other words, I feel, look, and sound like shit. I'm a triple threat today.

the luckiest day ever!

At least for the Chinese it is. 8 is the luckiest number in Chinese culture, so it wasn't a coincidence that the Beijing summer Olympics fall on 8/8/2008, that shit was planned out. Also, I heard that Zhang Yimou (one my favorite Chinese directors, I'm using two of his movies for my master's thesis) is "directing" the opening ceremony tonight. I hope everyone plans on watching it! My only regret is I didn't make Olympic themed cupcakes for the event, but media cupcake did so I can just dream that they're mine.

the world makes sense again!

The last few weeks of my life have been a little crazy, to say the least. Attempting to learn Mandarin in 5 weeks? Insane. Having class 8 hours a day? Tortuous. Packing up my life to move out of the country? Nuts.

So, when I logged on for about the 10th time yesterday to icanhascheezburger and saw that tomorrow is LOLcat day, none of that stuff seemed to matter anymore. Everything in my world seemed to make sense. How can I possibly worry about anything when it's LOLcat day? Answer: it's not possible!

I don't know what I'm going to do to celebrate this glorious holiday, it was kinda thrown at me last minute. Maybe I'll do a pet photo shoot with Tater Tot and Spongecat and make some LOLs out of them. Who knows! The possibilities are endless.

sprinkle's strawberry cupcake recipe

I was supposed to visit my besties today at Google but had to cancel last minute due to Tater drama. It was a very last minute decision to not go and I was super disappointed to have to reschedule, after all, I had already prepared for the trip. And by "prepared for the trip" I mean "made some delicious cupcakes." No guest should ever visit a person empty handed, in this girl's opinion.

A few weeks ago I shamefully stood in line for over an hour for something that did not result in a roller coaster ride or an iPhone 3G. It was for a Sprinkles Cupcake. Was it worth it? Yes. Would I stand in line that long ever again for a cupcake? No. But I mean, you can't live in SoCal and not try a Sprinkles cupcake at least once. It was my fault, I came two hours before closing and everyone else that thought "Hey, a cupcake would be a fun way to end the evening" was there along with me.

Imagine my delight when I found THE Sprinkles Cupcake strawberry recipe posted on Martha Stewart's website! Since it's strawberry season, and well, I am Strawberry, I just had to test it out. Results: absolutely delicious! And good thing is, you can use frozen strawberries and enjoy this delicious recipe all year long!

Sprinkles Strawberry Cupcakes

Ingredients
For Cupcakes:
2/3 cup whole fresh or frozen strawberries, thawed
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour, sifted
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon coarse salt (or regular salt if you don't have coarse salt)
1/4 cup whole milk, room temperature
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, room temperature
1 cup sugar
1 large egg, room temperature
2 large egg whites, room temperature

For frosting:
1/2 cup whole frozen strawberries, thawed
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, firm and slightly cold
Pinch of coarse salt
3 1/2 cups confectioners' sugar, sifted
1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

HINT: Don't just set eggs on your counter, because, uh, eggs roll.

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a 12-cup muffin tin with cupcake liners; set aside.

2. Place strawberries in a small food processor; process until pureed. You should have about 1/3 cup of puree, add a few more strawberries if necessary or save any extra puree for frosting; set aside.

3. In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, and salt; set aside. In a small bowl, mix together milk, vanilla, and strawberry puree; set aside.

4. In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, cream butter on medium-high speed, until light and fluffy. Gradually add sugar and continue to beat until well combined and fluffy. Reduce the mixer speed to medium and slowly add egg and egg whites until just blended.

5. With the mixer on low, slowly add half the flour mixture; mix until just blended. Add the milk mixture; mix until just blended. Slowly add remaining flour mixture, scraping down sides of the bowl with a spatula, as necessary, until just blended.

6. Divide batter evenly among prepared muffin cups. Transfer muffin tin to oven and bake until tops are just dry to the touch, 22 to 25 minutes. Transfer muffin tin to a wire rack and let cupcakes cool completely in tin before icing.

7. Place strawberries in the bowl of a small food processor; process until pureed. In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat together butter and salt on medium speed until light and fluffy. Reduce mixer speed and slowly add confectioners' sugar; beat until well combined. Add vanilla and 3 tablespoons strawberry puree (save any remaining strawberry puree for another use); mix until just blended. Do not overmix or frosting will incorporate too much air. Frosting consistency should be dense and creamy, like ice cream.

I added two different pink sugar sprinkles just for looks, but these babies are delicious with or without any kind of decoration. Mine didn't rise very high because I used self-rising flour instead of all-purpose flour which the recipe called for (I didn't have any and didn't feel like going to the grocery store), but it didn't affect taste at all.

tater tot the toothless wonder

A while ago Tater Tot and Smokey the Bandit (the raccoon that comes and steals cat food from us every night) got into an epic battle which surely would have ended with Tater Tot in a pool of blood and Smokey sneaking off into the night with cat food in his hands had my dad not broken it up. Tater Tot is all bark and no bite. He talks the talk, but can't walk the walk, and I don't know if any of you have ever seen an angry raccoon, but they friggin' run the walk. That's how intense they are.

Needless to say, I urged my parents to take Tater to the Vet to get rabies shots but since Tater acted fine post-battle they sort of forgot about it. Today I decided I should take him just to get checked out and get an update on all of his vaccinations. Not to mention, yesterday I noticed that one of his teeth was missing and I had a flashback to a few months back when yanked a cat food can from his mouth and thought, "OH NO, I pulled out one of his teeth!" I didn't do a thorough inspection or anything, but I figured it would be worth bringing up to the veterinarian if I was going to be in there anyway.

One hour, 3 walks around the parking lot, and lots of whining at the female pomeranian in heat sitting in the waiting room (hence the walks outside), I was informed by the veterinarian that Tater Tot's gums are severely infected. I don't know how this could happen. He gets professionally groomed ALL the time and they always brush his teeth. Supposedly. I know it isn't their fault, but I am very disappointed that they never brought it up to me that his teeth are in such bad shape. Do you ever inspect your dog's pearly whites? Because I don't!

Well, after I stopped crying hysterically and found a hankerchief in my purse to semi-compose myself, the vet let me know that for sure his front teeth need to be extracted, possibly more, and the infected pieces of gums need to be removed. It's horrible, I know, but the first thought that flashed through my head was How much is this going to cost?

The first thing I asked, though, was "Well how is he going to eat?" I imagined Tater, toothless, drooling as he tried to nom on some leftover tamale casserole. And the waterworks started again. The vet tried to calm me down, and let me know that dogs don't really need their front teeth at all, and a lot of dogs lose their teeth and they eat just fine. So why even get the surgery, then? Well, turns out that if the infection isn't removed then it can spread into the bloodstream and then into the heart and then HE CAN DIE. Clearly, I really had no options in this. The vet told me she needed to go work out an estimate for the surgery, which of course meant it was going to cost a lot.

In total, it's going to be around $550 (give or take $50 depending on how many teeth they end up removing). So, faithful bloggers, I'm putting up a "Tater Tot the Toothless Wonder" donation button for the next three weeks. Ya, donation buttons can be lame, but y'know what? I'm moving to China and don't really have an disposable income at the moment, so desperate times call for desperate measures. No pressure.

superlatives make my stomach hurt

I know "superlatives" isn't exactly a word you see in your every day life, but every time I do see it I always think it says "superlaxatives". Isn't that weird? "Superlaxatives" isn't even something real, so why do I have such a mental block when it comes to that word? Maybe it's because I was co-in charge of my high school yearbook's superlatives my senior year and I have horrible memories tallying up votes for countless hours.

One of the coordinators for my grad program thought it would be a good idea to create a yearbook for this year's cohort, and of course you can't have a yearbook without having superlatives. The categories were mostly inside jokes (our creepy research professor won "biggest flirt") and I ended up winning "most likely to be stalked by a Chinese man". I guess they have a thing for redheads, which is convenient for me. I had my fingers crossed for "most likely to wrestle a panda bear", but a guy won that one.

temporarily cracked or permanently broken?

Andy asked me to be a guest blogger on her blog this weekend, and since it's titled Life Isn't So Terrible After All, I thought a discussion of relationships would be appropriate. You can also find this on her website.


Relationships are all about ebs and flows. No matter how hard we try, no one can be perfect 24/7, and because of this our relationships will suffer from time to time. It's important to recognize when these bumps in the road are happening, and to evaluate whether your bond with your significant other is temporarily cracked, or permanently broken. And there is a difference. A "hard time" does not necessarily indicate an "impossible time," and the most effective way to measure where you think your relationship is really headed (out of the darkness and into the light, or to splitsville) is to know yourself. Know what you want and need from a relationship. Know the things about yourself that require work in order to make you happy. Know your limits and where you are willing to make sacrifices and compromises, and where you will put your foot down.

And if things just aren't working with someone, and you've tried your best, know when it's time to let go. Being the one to make this decision is not easy by any means. Sure, it gives you the upper hand (whatever that means), and you get to be the "dumper" rather than the "dumped", but there is no denying that breaking up sucks no matter how you slice it. The problem with being the "dumper" in a relationship void of any obvious flaws like emotional/physical abuse or infidelity, is that oftentimes you feel like breaking up is your only option. It's difficult to quantify feeling unappreciated or unsupported, or to put a statistical number to how much effort you put into the relationship versus your lover. So when we find ourselves leaving a partner for these reasons, even if it is our choice, we can still feel rejected, unhappy, and confused.

We wonder what we did wrong to merit such treatment. Why couldn't he just call me every day? Why was it such a battle to get him to support my goals and achievements? What did I do to deserve such emotional neglect? The problem with these questions is they have no answers and the more you think about them, the harder it will be to get over a split with your loved one. There is no true closure when a relationship ends, because no matter how many "Why did this happen to us?" conversations you have with your EX, you never get the answers you want, and usually end up having more than when you started the conversation 3 hours ago (get off the phone, already!).

My advice? Recognize that this relationship is permanently broken, and no amount of conversational glue will put it back together. If you are in the position of "dumper" because you felt unappreciated and emotionally neglected, realize that your partner is not going to change just because you want them to. I am someone that truly believes people can and do change, but a person needs to want to change on their own, not because someone asked them to. If you ask a partner to change and they truly do not think in their heart that they need to change, then they'll stay the same, and maybe even resent you for thinking they need to change.

After a break-up, take time away from talking to your EX. It's easier said than done, but in the end, you cannot continue talking to a lover like nothing has changed when you two are no longer in a relationship. Friendships can often be fostered from failed romantic relationships, but these friendships DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT, happen over night. Spend at least a few weeks not talking to your EX, they are your EX after all and hence should no longer be a huge part of your life. Use this time to work on you, to spend time with friends you didn't get to see a lot because you were in a relationship, and to re-connect with people you haven't talked to in a while (Facebook is great for this).

Every dark cloud has a silver lining. One relationship in your life may be coming to an end, but this gives you a chance to be selfish for once in your life and focus all your energy on yourself rather than a lover, to do things your EX never wanted to do, and to meet new people. When you feel down and out and think you might have made the wrong decision, think of the reasons why you are where you are and try to remember that this is a positive change in your life, even though it might feel hard at times. And then eat a cupcake, they always help.

how to tell if your mother reads your blog

Sure, you could check your visitor stats, but seriously, who has time for that?

The easiest way to tell if your mother reads your blog is to make a post about Playboy Bunnies and then wait three days for this book to coincidentally be sent to you:

I'll let you know how it works out for me. I'm good at pretending to be flirtatious and outgoing (my license plate frame says "Let's get dirty in my 4x4", an impulse county fair purchase four years ago), but in reality I have no idea how to flirt. I think I have actually flirted with men in my life, but I'm never fully aware of when I'm doing it or if they realize I'm trying to flirt with them. In my non-expert opinion, flirting is 60% giggling and 40% touching the guy and saying things like "You're so funny!", perhaps the Bunnies will shed some light on this for me. I wonder if there's a chapter on boob jobs.

Sigh, this post makes me miss Martini even more than I did before. COME BACK!!!

put. down. the. lolcat.

I apologize to anyone who has been a victim of my late-night, not completely sober, LOLcat-ing recently. In my opinion, it's way more awesome than drunk dialing, but also slightly more bizarre. Especially to those people who don't know what LOLcats are. Anyway, I am sorry to those of you who received an image like this posted on your blog or Facebook wall over the weekend:

DRUNK LOLZING
IZ RELAVINT
2 MAI INTRSTS.

WHY SO SERIOUS

Despite having bought our Dark Knight tickets three days early, we still had to wait in line for 2 1/2 hours. It. was. totally. worth. it. Not only did I get to watch sexy Christian Bale with a shirt off for probably an hour of screen time, but the audience was awesome and a bunch of theater employees got really into it and dressed up like characters. This photograph was taken right before we battled to the death:

Clearly, I won. Batman always wins.

Did anyone else noticed Cilian Murphy's 10 second cameo? Is he going to be a major character in a future Batman installment? I hope so!

Also, I need some male input on this, Maggie Gyllenhal is fug, right? I mean, she looks like a troll, doesn't she? I just didn't see her fitting in as a love interest, but then again her predecessor Katie Holmes was in the same league, that is, the not-sexy-chick league. Who do you think would have made a better Rachel? I think Charlize Theron would have been a good pick, maybe Anne Hathaway. Yeah, Anne Hathaway for sure. She has that good girl quality that a Batman love interests need, but is still gorgeous. Or Rachel McAdams! Thoughts?

holy self-indulgent shopping spree, batman!

I am a woman. A 20-something year old, fashion forward, label hungry woman. Which means I'll pretty much use any excuse to go shopping. So, when I made plans with some friends to see Dark Knight tomorrow evening, my mind immediately began to race with all of the fun outfit possibilities. After kicking ass and taking names during my Chinese final this morning (I got an A, thank you), I hopped into my Jeep and raced to the mall, with visions of this shirt in my head:

Seriously, I could not believe they still had some left. I was panicky all day thinking they might have sold out, but they had it, and in a size S, too! It's a men's shirt, so it's still pretty big, but it doesn't matter because it's so cute and topical. I love topical clothing. Who am I kidding, I love all clothing, but I like my graphic tees to be somewhat socially relevant.

I convinced my friends to buy Dark Knight tickets early, which makes me way less anxious about what everyone is projecting will be a CRAZY opening weekend. 9:30 p.m. showing, baby. I'm so excited. I have this weird thing for comic book movies. I'm tempted to use the word "obsession", but I think that might be a little strong, especially since I have never so much as held a real-life comic book. Maybe I just have a thing for buff dudes in tights. Whatever it is, I always go to comic book movies opening weekend (Spiderman 1, 2, and 3 I went to midnight showings) because opening weekend audiences are always so pumped up and psyched to be there. Sometimes they even clap, which I sort of think is really lame, but whatever, it makes me feel more involved with the whole movie-going experience.

In the spirit of milking a sure-thing for as much money as possible, Domino's has introduced a Gotham City Pizza. Basically it's just a normal pepperoni pizza, but they throw around the word "cloak" in their advertisements and slapped on a Batman logo, and presto, you have a Dark Knight pizza. You know I'm ordering one both before and after--maybe during, will they deliver to a movie theater?--the movie. Ultimate nom-age.

let them (read: me) eat cake

I went to Disneyland with my mom and little sister yesterday and sometime between lunch and dinner they forced me to eat this:


By forced I mean they had to follow me through 4 different lands (Tomorrowland, Fantasyland, Adventureland, and Frontierland) until I finally found this adorable but overpriced squiggly concoction of grease and sugar, two minutes before the restaurant closed, no doubt. Okay, so what? you might ask. It's just funnel cake. Well, I "gave up" dessert last month in an effort to live a healthier lifestyle. I still allow myself to eat frozen yogurt, because a life without frozen yogurt is a life that's not worth living, if you ask me, but I have noticed significant changes in my appearances over the past dessert-free month. I have lost 6 pounds without making any other lifestyle changes and have honestly never felt physically better in my life.

However, the universe is a strange thing, and when one thing in your life is going awesome, it is a known fact that something else in your life has to suffer, which is why I absolutely needed that funnel cake yesterday. It actually ended up not being delicious at all, the strawberry topping was insanely sweet and tasted more like strawberry room spray than a strawberry from the earth. But it seemed like an absolute necessity at the time, and actually did provide me with about 15 seconds of pure joy. Which is a lesson we can all learn from: funnel cake, as tempting and necessary as it may seem, will not solve any of your problems. At least not in any long-term sense.

Similar logic kept me from irrationally chopping off my hair, thank gawd. As I was dialing the number to the salon I realized, sure, it would be a big change and make me feel in control of me during a time in my life where I feel particularly not in control, but then I realized I would wake up the next day and recognize that nothing in my life had really changed. Only now I also hated my short hair cut.

breaking up...is sometimes easy

If you live in the Playboy Mansion and happen to be named Hugh Hefner, that is. Can you imagine an environment MORE conducive to getting over a break-up? Because I can't.

How am I supposed to have any faith in love if the bunnies can't even stay together? Incidentally, Kendra was my least favorite Hefner girlfriend, so I'm glad she got the boot (and you all know that's really the issue, not her so called "empire"). It's all about Bridget, UOP alumni unite!

woof woof, chow chow

Way back in April (it's nearly August, people!), I wrote about Martha Stewart's Chow Chow named Paw Paw passing away. The story particularly touched me because I had recently lost a dog, too, and knew the sadness that comes after losing a pet. While I didn't lose any sleep over Martha's loss, I am happy to see that she is going to get a puppy soon! And, to top it off, they're from the same bloodline as Paw Paw! Isn't that precious?

Okay, but seriously, how cute are Chow Chow puppies? They're just like pomeranians, only huge. I've heard they make great guard dogs, too, something which Tater Tot is admittedly not great at being. I mean, he barks, but he also weighs 7 pounds so any intruder could just drop kick him with minimal effort then continue stealing all my great stuff.

happy bastille day!

I have been fortunate enough to actually be in France (and Paris, at that) for several Bastille Day celebrations, and us Americans can talk all the smack we want about the French, but they friggin' know how to throw a party. Fireworks, wine, cheese, pastries...sounds like heaven to me. Check out my favorite cupcake artist Cakespy's Frenchy creation in honor of the holiday:

The Eiffel tower AND cupcakes? Awesome x infinity. If you're friends with me in real life and I have your e-mail address, you've probably been bombarded recently with a slew of SomeEcards because I pretty much think they are the funniest thing ever right now in my life. They're mostly totally random and sarcastic and have crazy pictures that usually don't have anything to do with the text.

To be fair, I don't care about the Fourth of July, either. Ya, I said it.

"are you here to make friends? cause i'm not here to make friends"

This is the best video ever. In the world. I'm not exaggerating.

If you go on to a reality TV show where a prize is involved, you are required to say "I'm not here to make friends" at least once. You'll probably even say it twice, or three dozen times if you're on Flavor of Love (this is flavor of love, not flavor of friendship).

I shared this video with some old high school friends, and one of them came up with a great idea. There should be a reality show where the only goal is to make friends, and if you don't make enough friends, they kick you off. And, at the end, the prize money would be fake, and the judges would say, "Your reward for winning is...all your new friends!" and then they'd punch you in the nuts for being such a moron and going on reality TV.

MY MIND HAS BEEN BLOWN

I have spent 23 years of my life thinking I was an Ox. I was born in 1985 and have been told that was my Chinese astrological sign since we celebrated the Chinese New Year back in preschool. Well, three days ago in my Chinese language class my life was turned upside down when I found out that I'm really a rat. I feel like I have been living a lie the past two decades. I can't believe I never put it together myself. Chinese New Year is in February (or the end of January), so clearly January 2nd counts as the year previous. So, according to the Chinese I was born in 1984, which makes this my year, since 2008 is the year of the rat. No wonder things have been looking up. It's all about the rat, baby.

Interestingly, both of my parents are also rats. My family is just filled with good luck!

In other less exciting news, I broke up with Rod. It was one of those things that was going to happen sooner or later (read: I am moving to China for who knows how long), so well, it happened. Maybe I'll talk about it in more detail some day, but today is not that day.

truer words have never been spoken

"After that it got pretty late, and we both had to go, but it was great seeing Annie again. I... I realized what a terrific person she was, and... and how much fun it was just knowing her; and I... I, I thought of that old joke, y'know, the, this... this guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, "Doc, uh, my brother's crazy; he thinks he's a chicken." And, uh, the doctor says, "Well, why don't you turn him in?" The guy says, "I would, but I need the eggs." Well, I guess that's pretty much now how I feel about relationships; y'know, they're totally irrational, and crazy, and absurd, and... but, uh, I guess we keep goin' through it because, uh, most of us... need the eggs."
Woody Allen as Alvy Singer, Annie Hall

I'm hesitant about posting youtube links since my last youtube video of a MadTV Keeping Up With The Kardashians parody has since been removed, but this is my favorite scene from my favorite movie of all time, so I'm going to post it anyway. Plus, the above quote is so much better when you actually hear Woody Allen saying it.



For now, I'm okay without the eggs. They're too high in cholesterol, anyway.